Here are some vaguely-relevant consumable goods that will definitely make your life seem richer and more robust and less suicide-inducing and shitty. FILL THE VOID IN YOUR GUTS, SAD-SACK! Below is a bunch of stuff that I am selling/shipping personally or selling on Zazzle. Click here for my shipping rates. Click here to view your shopping cart (secure PayPal, under my business name Standard Design).

YOU NEED TO LOOK ME IN THE EYE (2010) 17x21 2-color screenprint - black and silver! The first art print produced based on a comic from The Optimist. That's some bad-ass merch right there! Numbered edition of 60. - $20

EVEN LIONS WILL FEAR YOU: Two Years of Whiskey! Tango! Foxtrot! (2009, 52 pages, 8"x10.5") A towering collection - every WTF strip published in 2007-2008, plus a bunch of unpublished ones, some early comics that pre-date the strip, and a few full-page comics that were published elsewhere. If you've only read WTF online, you are missing the glorious effect of a bloopy yet crisp halftone pattern on bright white paper. Highly recommended. And in case you were asking yourself "What the heck does the name of the book mean?", here lies the answer to your unspoken query. Purchase a copy for the extremely reasonable price of $4

LOOK ME IN THE EYE T-SHIRT
Adapted from this comic.
Available on Zazzle

SAVE THE PLANET T-SHIRT
Adapted from this comic.
Available on Zazzle

I LOVE THIS TRAVEL MUG TRAVEL MUG from this comic. Available on Zazzle.

HELLO DARKNESS, MY OLD FRIEND STICKER - A super-cool 3x9 inch 2-color vinyl sticker. - $2 each or 3 for $5

one for $2:

three for $5:

MASSA-FUCKIN'-CHUSETTS! - 15x19 3-color art print celebrating the majesty of my commonwealth. Signed 'n' numbered screenprinted edition of 65. - $20

At this juncture, I feel compelled to mention that there are lots of other posters, comics, CDs, and other junk for sale over at tompappalardo.com (same PayPal shopping cart)